Okay batch B stream two orientation course ended about two weeks ago. Well, I’m privileged to be posted to the capital of the largest state in Naija! (google is at your reach).
Between, below are my list of the 10 types of people you meet in the Nysc Orientation camp.
1. The Clowns
These are the extremely funny ones, mostly warri guys. They always have something to say to get people’s ribs cracking. You will never see them been serious for once, all they do is find someone or something to make fun of. They never get tired of talking. Don’t bother confronting them for anything because you will end up as their topic and have so many persons laughing at you.
This category include the otondos that always get it all wrong on the parade ground. After been corrected severally, they still get confused. You see them turning to the right at the command of ‘left turn’. When others are at Attention, that’s when they have their hands behind at ease. Their hands will never rhyme with others during quick match and when they halt, their legs always bangs last.
They are the kind of people that still hangs their ‘head dress’ in the air even after the completion of the 3 hearties to the Governor.
3. The Scroungers
They can beg to borrow your destiny. They never possessed anything of their own instead indulge in the habit of borrowing every possible thing from you, and then you will have to beg before they return it. These set of persons lived in school hostel and are used to the hostel lifestyles, so they never bothered to come with basic needs with the assurance of getting it from others. Its when you just finished locking your box and set to go out that they will come and be like; ‘bros abeg I need toothpaste’ .. abeg I fit use your towel? ‘bros I go like borrow your comb’ …..
and also they are never with ‘change’ …always asks for N20 to buy table water.
These ones are the first to complain about how terrible the food is and yet they never missed a meal. These kind of people will join the platoon set to leave the parade ground first, so that they can get their plates washed quickly and gets to the kitchen before any other person does. You see them forming a que even when the water to make eba is yet to boil.
They already exhaust thier money to Mami at the first week of Orientation.
This kind of people can be so annoying en, you been standing in sun for hours and then you see them coming from nowhere to join the long ‘line’ at the front. Shunting is in their blood, even where you have just 3 persons on a line, they still find a way to chance the last person. Some do it politely by begging to join……and some will just be like ‘guy I dey here before o, I went to blow my nose ni’ . …..who be mumu
These are the no dulling guys. They are in camp to hunt for girls and their aim is to woo as many as possible so that as they are serving the father land, they will be servicing their rooster as well
7. Photo Freak
The ladies are more in this category. They prefer spending all their money on photograph to feeding their tummy. They never get satisfied with selfies no matter the amount of shots taken
8. Do-nothing crew
You begin to wonder if this kind of persons were forced to be in camp. They don’t participate in anything, be it the fun aspect and the boring parts. They hardly go for parade and lectures and always complain about the Nysc scheme being a waste of time. You will always find them laying on their bed in the room even after the soldiers has chased everyone out. They have their drugs and fake medical reports to cover up.
9. The Old youth
These ones don’t want to be left out of the fun in camp, so they leave their children and wives at home to take part in the orientation. They do every possible thing not to look old specifically their ‘skin’ hairstyle. And then you see them very quiet. They prefer not to be noticed.
10. Feel free to add to the list!
– Corper Dotwilliz
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