Any relationship is never 100% perfect, yet one that makes you feel loved, happy and truly wanted is possible. Relationship is partnership where both partners are ready to give and take with feelings of true respect for each other. Anyone can say with heartfelt words that they love you, but they are words. If a partner proves their love to you by their actions, which gives you feelings of self-worth, confidence, respect and a consideration for your feelings then that is a healthy partnership.
For you to know you are being used in a relationship look out for this signs:
- Selfishness On The Part Of Your Partner: In relationship no one is important than the other, partners should be treated with preference, none is above the other. Where it is only a person that is working hard to keep things smoothly and sacrificing, then it is time to stop and think that am I just dating myself or forcing the relationship. If a partner is more concern about him or herself in a relationship and does not even regard the feeling or opinion of the other, that is a toxic relationship, it is not healthy for anyone. Don’t think that it doesn’t matter, he or she will change, I can just be doing and tolerating all now. No dear, it matters, if you continue tolerating, you may only hurt yourself more at the end.
- Just Intimacy, No Commitment: They want intimacy with you but will give you no sign of commitment. They may shower you with compliments, tell you how much they love you and what a great person you are. When they have had sex or intimacy, their feelings cool and they will be on their merry way, until they feel horny again. At the point of sexual intercourse is when his or her lips tastes sweet full of sugary words, after it nothing else to offer. The next call you will receive is when next they need. Wait! Does he or she only say I love you when horny? Then, you’re being used. I love you is nothing than your “mumu button”.
- Your Partner Is All About The Favour: Be careful early on in the relationship if you feel that it’s you that’s paying for lots of stuff. Meals out, drinks, driving to places; it all adds up. If you are receiving no contribution, you are definitely being used. It’s great to be an independent, but when it comes to relationship you should on each other. It should be a symbiotic one, you both enjoying, nobody is at detriment. When your partner is all about the gain, anything of his or her benefit in a relationship, take heed that is a red flag.
- Always Busy: Some people are in a relationship where their partners are supposed to be called Busy. Days can go on and on without talking, their partners do not even care. Be extremely careful if you seem to be going days without hearing from them. They could be with someone else and just have you as side chick or nigga. In a healthy relationship a day is too much not to communicate, not necessarily a call, it may be a chat or text. When you notice you are always the one keeping in touch and your partner is always saying busy, hold on, it may be that you are being used. There should not be anybody that will be too busy to text, if he or she claim busy as an excuse for not communicating for that long period, ask that did you visit the toilet during this period or did you even take a time to eat? If he or she did, which I know the answer will be yes, it may only means that he or she do not regard you and have no feelings for you at all.
- No friend Or Family Is introduced to you: If it is a healthy relationship you should have being introduced to either friends or family of your partner. At times in the early stage of the relationship, you may not know anybody really close to him but with time, it is expected you do. You may have met them at some point, but you have never had quality time getting to know them. If your partner keeps you out of sight in public, seems concerned if they see someone they know or wants to keep you out of the way, they could be cheating, or worse be married! Then, you’re really being used.
- Cheat; Even Over And Over: If your partner is cheating on you, it is a serious sign that you are being especially when he or she does that over and over again. You may give an excuse that it was just once it may be a mistake, I should just forgive which I think is unhealthy too. But if it is done repeatedly, do not joke with it, come out of the relationship, you are purely being used. Once maybe a mistake, but twice and above is a serious thing that needs a radical action.
- You Are Uncomfortable Around Him/Her: In a relationship you should be free to be yourself before your partner. When you notice you are always trying not to annoy your partner or exceed a certain boundary, it may be a sign that you’re being used. If you cannot play with him or her or even act ridiculous at times, then the relationship is faulty.
- Your Voice Is Silenced: If in your relationship you do not have a say or your words does hold water, you are only in a military Union and not a relationship. You should have a view in your relationship; your voice should be heard. You should not be afraid to say No, when No is the right answer.
- Your Partner Never Give Anything In Return: If all you see in your relationship is you doing all your good acts and your partner never give you back in the same coin may implies relationship exploitation. You do the shopping, the dates and your partner could not fund any, he or she always forgets wallet that contain money and ATM card at home. Just reason it dear, may it be that you’re being used?
- Your Special Days Are Not Remembered: Lastly on this note is when your partner does not even remember or celebrate your special days. You will always be the one to call in the evening that you didn’t even celebrate my birthday. Oh today is our anniversary, I didn’t even reach out to me and he or she is always like I forgot, I am sorry. It continues just like that every year. But when it comes to your partner’s day, you carry it on your head like hair cream. Darling, do not bother to bend down to check that relationship, just stop. It is just a play where you are only be used!
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